We’re Moving Abroad… and It’s a Lot.

When I hear myself say the words, “We’re moving to Italy!”, in my head my voice lifts at the end like a question wrapped in excitement and my mind fills with visions of cobblestone streets, slow mornings with espresso, and my kids running freely through sunlit piazzas.

And that’s very true.

But there’s another version of this story too…
A quieter one.

The one where I pause and think, we’re really doing this….
And a whisper of the question, can I handle this?…

We’re MOVING to ITALY!

But, now that it’s real…
I didn’t expect the excitement with a side dish of anxiety.
I didn’t expect to hesitate, or question.
I didn’t expect to have both a massive cry ball in my chest, and do a giddy dance in my mind every time I think of what this next chapter has to hold.

This is change. Big, meaningful change.
The kind that stretches you a little.
The kind that, dare I say it, scares you a little.
The kind that takes your comfort zone and throws it out the window.

And I thought moving to Kansas was going to be hard.

We’re not gone yet.
Yet, it’s like I’m sitting in the middle of a fairytale future and a sadness for this life that we’re about to leave.

I’m realizing that the home we’ve built here – and the neighbors and friendships that feel like family – are numbered and fleeting.

I already look around our house differently.

These walls hold our story. They’re filled with memories:

• The first steps of all three of our kids;

• Where our oldest fell and had to get stitches;

• Where we welcomed Alden to our wild bunch; and,

• Where I got to witness what love looked like in the eyes of a toddler.

I see things with intention now.
Our routine feels like an old friend.

• Even the chaos…

• the shoes thrown into every room,

• the crumbs that cover the kitchen floor

• the noise I used to wish away (well… let’s be honest, I still wish the noise away)…

… it all feels softer somehow.
Not perfect. Just real. Ours.

I catch myself wanting to slow it down. To take it in. To hold onto it while it’s still here.

Because soon, this version of life will shift. Things will be different.

People keep saying, “You must be so excited.”

And I am. Truly.

But what I’m learning is that excitement doesn’t cancel out everything else. It just sits alongside it.

I’m excited for what’s ahead.
AND
I’m grateful for what we have now.

I’m excited for the adventure.
AND
I’m scared and overwhelmed by it.

All of that can be true at the same time.

No one really prepares you for how in-between this season feels.
Not fully here anymore.
Not there yet either.
Just in transition.

Planning, packing, talking about the future; while still living the present. Answering questions about a life that hasn’t quite started yet.

And as a mom, what I feel has a ripple effect.

I’m not the only one stepping into something new; I’m helping my kids step into it too.

Helping to define their comfort. Their routines. Their sense of home.

And I find myself wondering what they’ll remember most from this season we’re in.

There are still unknowns, of course.

• What will it feel like when we arrive?

• How long will it take to feel settled?

• Will we actually learn Italian?

• What will we miss most?

• What will surprise us in the best way?

• How will I cope with my mom living on the other side of the world?

I don’t have those answers yet.
But I do know, we’re going to figure it out along the way.

Because underneath all of it, there’s something steadying me.
A quiet sense that we’re stepping into something great.

That growth doesn’t always feel clean or simple.
That new chapters rarely arrive fully figured out.
And that sometimes, the best parts of life are the ones you can’t fully plan in advance.

So, we’re moving abroad.

And I’m not trying to have it all figured out before we go. GASP!

I AM, however, here for it.
For the ordinary days still in front of us.
For the insanity it’s going to be to actually get there with three littles.
And, for the moments that will become memory before we even realize it.

Maybe that’s what this season really is.
Not just flipping to this new chapter, but maybe seeing how our story unfolds.

Learning how to live fully in this space with gratitude for what is, and openness for what’s coming next.

We’re moving abroad.
And it’s a lot…